Sooo I'm here in Rockford. Yay! I miss mom & Aaron like crazy, & I hate that I had to leave them. But hopefully the separation wont be for long.
Being in Rockford is great. I've missed everybody, a ton. I've just missed Rockford, which is a crazy feeling since I've pretty much hated this city since I was 13 years old.
I've started looking for a job, (no I'm not going to try to get my job back at B & N, STOP ASKING!!) no joy so far, but that's ok. I didn't think some one worth working for would hire me right away!
Over all, I'm pretty happy. So far I'm glad I came back. Even if I don't end up staying in Rockford I'm happy to be here, at least while I'm in school.
Change is good, & it was nice to get away for a while. It was awesome to see family that I haven't seen in years. But I know now that I don't want to live in Arizona, it's my vacation place.
I don't really want to write about my trip up, or what I've been doing since I got back.
What I really want to talk about is excuses.
I can't stand how people are willing to excuse the way others behave based on events in their past. Most people learn early on in life, the difference between being a 'good person' & being a 'bad person.' We all learn about loyalty, integrity, respect. As adolescents we learn that you shouldn't hit some one who is helpless, whether that some one is an animal, a child, or a spouse. We learn that when some one trusts you, it's wrong to take actions for your own enjoyment that would damage or break that trust. Any child can tell you that hurting some one is bad, & helping some one is good.
So why is it, that some one who knows the difference between right & wrong, some one who can think & make informed decisions, can have their actions excused?
There are shades of grey, I know. Some times it's hard to figure out how to do the right thing. But in some cases, it's obvious.
Horrible things happen to people. It's an inescapable part of life. Why are we not only alowed, but almost expected to blame our actions & our choices on the events of our past? If some one was molested as a child, & they grow up to be a child molester, their past doesn't make it right.
If some one grew up with abusive partents, & they abuse their children, what their family did (or didn't do) doesn't make it ok.
We all have the ability to think things through, & make the right choices. I am in control of my actions, events in the past, no matter how traumatizing, do not dictate my every move. Because I don't let them.
I know this sounds like a load of bull, since I'm not explaining who or what I'm talking about. But this has been bugging me for a while & I needed to vent.
Basically, losers who do awful shit to their friends or family & make excuses for it because of thier past really piss me off. You have a brain, I'm pretty sure you know how to use it. Think. Make decisions. It's not always that hard to do what's right.
